Signs of Abuse

You deserve to be treated with respect, and to feel safe emotionally, physically, and sexually in your relationship. Consider the signs of abuse described here and whether they describe your relationship.

Signs of Abuse

(from the National Domestic Violence Hotline

You may be in an emotionally abusive relationship if your partner:

      • Calls you names, insults you, or continually criticizes you.
      • Does not trust you and acts jealous or possessive.
      • Tries to isolate you from family or friends.
      • Monitors where you go, who you call, and who you spend time with.
      • Does not want you to work outside the home.
      • Controls finances or refuses to share money.
      • Punishes you by withholding affection.
      • Expects you to ask permission.
      • Threatens to hurt you, the children, your family, or your pets.
      • Humiliates you in any way.

You may be in a physically abusive relationship if your partner has ever:

      • Damaged property when angry (thrown objects, punched walls, kicked doors, etc.).
      • Pushed, slapped, bitten, kicked, or choked you.
      • Abandoned you in a dangerous or unfamiliar place.
      • Scared you by driving recklessly.
      • Used a weapon to threaten or hurt you.
      • Forced you to leave your home.
      • Trapped you in your home or kept you from leaving.
      • Prevented you from calling police or seeking medical attention.
      • Hurt your children.
      • Used physical force in sexual situations.

You may be in a sexually abusive relationship if your partner:

      • Views women as objects and believes in rigid gender roles.
      • Accuses you of cheating or is often jealous of your outside relationships.
      • Wants you to dress in a sexual way.
      • Insults you in sexual ways or calls you sexual names.
      • Has ever forced or manipulated you into to having sex or performing sexual acts.
      • Held you down during sex.
      • Demanded sex when you were sick, tired, or after beating you.
      • Hurt you with weapons or objects during sex.
      • Involved other people in sexual activities with you.