Purpose of the Site

This website is designed to be a resource for individuals who may be thinking about getting a divorce (or whose spouse is thinking about a divorce) or who may be trying to avoid getting a divorce.

If you are at the “crossroads of divorce,” you are facing a hard decision and possibly a difficult transition that will affect the future of your own life, the lives of family members, and your community.

The website contains solid information about important questions that people thinking about divorce often have:

• What is a “healthy marriage?”
• Will divorce make me happier?
• What to expect from the legal process?
• How common is divorce and what are potential factors?
• What are the potential consequences of divorce from a long-term marriage?
• Is divorce the right option for me? 
• How might divorce affect my children?
• How might divorce affect me?
• How might divorce affect my family financially?
• How common is it to think about divorce?
• Does divorce affect boys and girls differently?
• Am I in an abusive relationship?

We try to answer these questions and many more with research-based information. This is not a website that offers counseling services.

We provide some “Thinking About It” writing exercises to help you think more about this information and how it applies to you and your family.

We also provide some links to other good resources for people who may be thinking about divorce.

We know that these are sensitive questions to answer. Circumstances are different for everyone.

Divorce is a solution that many people consider in order to restore health and happiness to their lives; it is one method of dealing with marital struggles and trials. And we believe there are sometimes clear reasons for a divorce.

Many individuals going through divorce want to keep working to save the marriage but their partners do not. We try to be sensitive to different situations. It is not our intention to make judgments about what individuals should or should not do in difficult, personal circumstances.

At the same time, we try to present the scientific research on marriage and divorce accurately and fairly. And the research is clear that, on average, divorce presents risks for children, adults, and the communities they live in.

In some instances, divorce actually improves the lives of those involved, but for the most part, researchers have found that divorce puts children at two-to-three times the risk for a wide range of problems. And it can be hard on adults, as well. Divorce is costly for taxpayers too because so many divorced families fall into poverty, rely on government services, or end up in drawn-out legal battles in our courts.

Research also suggests that some individuals at the crossroads of divorce may be able to repair their marriages and avoid these potential problems. And there are good resources available to help those who want to work to keep trying to improve their relationship.

This website can give you solid, research-based information that will help you make the best choices in your circumstances. It’s not a “how-to” book to fix problems in your marriage, but we suggest some resources that you could use to get some help.

We want to provide you with as much solid information as possible about the realities of divorce so you can make the best decision possible for your situation.

We hope this website will help you choose the right path forward for you—to divorce or to try to work it out.